Greek mythology tells of a deviant Titan (really a son of a Titan) who spat in the faces of the gods, committed a series of celestial thefts, and paid the price of for his transgressions by having his eternally regenerating internal organs constantly devoured by an eagle while strapped to a rock. Rough life. The Titan of crafty counsel and forethought is credited for molding mankind out of clay, stealing fire from Zeus and delivering it to humanity, and tricking the gods out of the best portion of the sacrificial feast in order to nurture his human creation.
Stories outline the account of an ancient feast in which Prometheus (our Titan champion) divided a bull for a great sacrificial feast. He tucked some of the tastiest portions away for man while offering a lesser half to the gods. Zeus did not appreciate the fact that Prometheus tucked the disgusting bull stomach and nasty vitals into the portion offered to the gods and punished Prometheus by withholding fire from mankind. The crafty Titan defied the gods and tucked fire away in a hollow tube eventually delivering it to man.
Legend notes that Prometheus was strapped to a rock and Zeus sent a bird to eat his liver every day for eternity. After the eagle feasted on his liver by day, it would regenerate by night, allowing for the perpetual torture of the human champion. Bottom line: It is probably a risky proposition to defy the gods and steal their secret technology.
In a somewhat more recent tale of the defiance of the gods, a modern Prometheus is portrayed in Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein. In 1818, the eighteen-year-old Shelley crafted a Gothic novel accounting the science-fiction misadventures of a scientist, Dr. Victor Frankenstein. Most folks are familiar with the doctor’s defiance of natural law in his scientific endeavor into the generation of life. He attempted to steal the power of the gods (or nature, etc.) through his electrical experiments with dead body parts.
Eventually, the doctor’s secretive experimentation delivers a living being. The now-famous Frankenstein’s monster stood eight feet tall, and rocked dull yellow eyes and translucent, yellowish skin. Rather than construct a beautiful life from the loam, the monster’s hideous form stirred feelings of disgust and horror in observers. The monster is rejected by its creator, eventually brings about the death of Victor’s love, Elizabeth, and battles the creator until his death on a ship in the Arctic Circle near the North Pole. The living dead hops overboard and floats away into the darkness afloat an icy barge, never to be seen again.
We reference these two tragic tales to frame today’s endeavor. In both legends, those who dared defy the gods in search of a power that was not meant to be wielded by human kind paid a severe penalty. Prometheus was sentenced to eternal suffering and Dr. Frankenstein sacrificed his family and eventually his own life for stealing a power reserved for gods. These tales of caution rightly proceed the generation and piloting of today’s Commander build.
It has never been the place of man to create life. We were not meant to pick through piles of dead bodies in search of creating the ultimate “living being.” We were not granted the right to steal from the gods! However, The Mimeoplasm begs Commander pilots to embark among these larcenous adventures. Like Prometheus we tuck away a cosmic gift. Like Dr. Frankenstein, we dig through graveyards in search of the desirable components to construct our marvelous, unnatural creation. Will we meet a similar fate? Is it worth the risk?
Commanding Unnatural Power
The Mimeoplasm allows the pilot of our wedge-colored deck to assemble abilities and physical forms that were never designed by the creators at Wizards of the Coast. Who in their right mind would unleash upon the world a 13/12 (Polar Kraken) Eternal Witness that kills opposing players with Commander damage in two rounds of combat? The Internet forums would cry out if Wizards announced the printing of a new 5-cost creature with the power and toughness of Jokulmorder (17/17) and the ability of Jin-Gitaxias, Core Augur. Imagine if you opened your next pack to find a 5cc Legendary creature staring back with an 18/18 frame (Krosan Cloudscraper) with Flying, Infect, and the options for Haste and Regeneration (à la Skithiryx, the Blight Dragon). For 6 mana, this one-turn killer would be reviled and feared by the masses.
These creatures are simply too powerful for Magic. They are broken and defy the laws of nature. However, The Mimeoplasm whispers into your ear, “Take the fire.” Your Commander beckons you to direct the lightning through the course veins of your undead creation in order to achieve something wonderful and magical. Will you answer the call?
When a deck architect begins building around The Mimeoplasm, the combinations are nearly endless. The summer’s most interesting Commander option asks players to dream. Imagine what you might create if you could steal the abilities of any creature and combine it with the power of any other creature? This dream can quickly turn into a nightmare scenario for your opponents as you construct 5-cost creatures with 11, 12, or 13 +1/+1 counters that come into play with the best text boxes that Magic has to offer. On top of that, you defiance of the design gods is further rewarded with the acknowledgement that The Mimeoplasm monstrosity that you construct will deal players Commander damage. At present, 21 points of combat damage delivered by a single Commander to an opponent will exit that player from the game. If the Commander has infect etched into the text box you can nearly cut that figure in half!
In the first part of our deck-construction article, we are going to brainstorm the optimal combinations that a player might like to assemble as he attempts to use and abuse The Mimeoplasm’s theme. The second part of this article (featured next Monday) will outline the engines we will use to populate the graveyard with our selected combinations and will essentially be the electrical current used to awaken our Frankenstein’s Monster.
We will attack our creature lineup logically by considering creatures that sport very desirable abilities and interesting text boxes, while also attending to the number of +1/+1 counters we can drop onto The Mimeoplasm upon entering the battlefield. Let’s roll through some of the delightfully evil and amusing creatures that folks might like to graft onto a huge Commander.
We Want You for Your Body
Blue, Green, and Black Fatties
- Jokulmorder (12/12)
- Krosan Cloudscraper (13/13)
- Polar Kraken (11/11)
- Death’s Shadow (13/13)
- Lord of Extinction (?/?)
The other creatures that can be included in our deck might also have great power, but these guys exemplify the top echelons of our fatty theme. In our next article, we are going to cover various engines that will place these creatures securely in our graveyard. As a sneak preview, you might want to consider the outstanding interactions of cards like Survival of the Fittest, Buried Alive, and Birthing Pod with our The Mimeoplasm theme. You are basically able to pitch specific cards into the proverbial drink while you create the correct mixture of giant bodies and keen abilities generated by your inner mad scientist.
We are going to cover some of the alternate win conditions offered by creatures in our build, but it is timely to mention that giving your Commander Infect through combinations with creatures like the aforementioned Skithiryx, the Blight Dragon and the recently printed Blighted Agent can ensure some quick victories. We are also to use the giant amount of +1/+1 counters assembled on our genetic mutation by abusing the interaction with Triskelion. If you have a later-game, sizeable Lord of Extinction, you might be able to machine-gun the table to death with your super-sized slime.
Just Kidding, We Respect You for Your Mind
Creatures with Intelligent Text Boxes
- Jin-Gitaxias, Core Augur
- Consecrated Sphinx
- Blighted Agent
- Body Double
- Primeval Titan
- Woodfall Primus
- Eternal Witness
- Skithiryx, the Blight Dragon
- Grave Titan
- Rune-Scarred Demon
- Puppeteer Clique
- Reiver Demon
- Xiahou Dun, the One-Eyed
When we consider the clever and interesting creations that can be fused together by combining these creatures’ abilities with the +1/+1 bonuses added by our lineup of phenomenal fatties, the evil scientist salivation gets going. Imagine if you had Lord of Extinction and Triskelion in the graveyard via Buried Alive (maybe also throwing in a copy of Genesis). When The Mimeoplasm comes into play, you might have exiled the two top picks leaving forty cards in the graveyard, making your Commander a 43/43 machine-gun killer. He would get forty +1/+1 counters from the Lord of Extinction’s power and three more from the Triskelion. The Triskelion would contribute its ability to the new monstrosity, and you could start wrecking face with your new killer creation.
If you combine Woodfall Primus with Death’s Shadow, you would get a 19/19 Commander with trample, persist, and the ability to knock out an opposing noncreature permanent when it hits the battlefield. These are epic. They are creations that might get you strapped down to a big rock while an eagle pecks at your liver, but they are worth it! If you love the fatties and you love to unlock your inner mad scientist, then The Mimeoplasm is an optimal choice for next Commander deck.
Next week, we will dive into the complex nature of electrifying our creations. We will explore how cards like Entomb and Birthing Pod might drive our deck alongside the polishing touches that will keep our mana base secure, our hands full, and our graveyard filled with choices. Let us know about some of your own ideas in the comments section and make sure to check back for Part 2 – It’s Alive!