Random Commander #23: Selesnya?a Hate Boar

Posted on June 4, 2024

Hello awesome Commander fans! Today I wanted to do something really fun! I wanted to knock out a Random Commander challenge! Last time was back here at year ago in Summer of 2023 (Random Commander 22: Illuminating Darkness | Article by Abe Sargent (coolstuffinc.com). EDHREC.com has a random shuffle button, and I smashed and grabbed the first one that appeared:

Here it is! This four-drop on curve 4/4 beater is our option! When he ETBs, you'll Tutor a basic Forest and Plains to your hand. Then your foes cannot pay life or sacrifice for costs or abilities, that shuts down loads of stuff! There are two ways to build around him, the lands or the Hate Bear. Let's do the latter.

Ready for my brew?

Ramp, Lands, Mana

Let's start with stuff that I like here. The dork costs three, ETBs with a 3/3 vigilance on-curve body to ramp you a Plains if someone has more lands, and another if they still do. The Harrow variant above will sac a land and ramp two tapped, but if you control your Commander or a few beefier dorks, you can ramp three instead. Nasty!

Now let's turn to key lands, like Boseiju, Who Endures. It can be discarded for two to Naturalize or Stone Rain something as emergency removal, but they are ramped. Maze of Ith doesn't tap for mana, but can be tapped to stop an attacker. Since Hate Bears tend to be smaller and not evasive, I wanted to keep myself alive, enter this land as well as Labyrinth of Skophos.

Let's finish with a land card drawing duo! (I also tossed in Minas Tirith). Bonders' Enclave will tap for colorless, ETBs untapped, and then taps with three to draw that card if you have a dork of size 4 or more in power, just like the Harrow above. War Room also ETBs untapped then taps with three to swap two life for a card. Love this pair loads here!

Hate Bears

Now let's turn to actual Hate Bears! The three-drop rare has a 2/3 flying beefy body with and nonbasic lands of your foes ETB tapped and you'll slow down casting, good when you won't have a big table of splashy stuff. The uncommon has flash and one toughness, and then flying too, and this time will force opposing tutors only to dig four down.

Linvala, Keeper of Silence is a 3/4 with flying and then your foes cannot activate their dorks. Kataki, War's Wage has a 2/1 body with forcing everyone to spend one mana tax to keep their artifacts in play, and I don't have mana rocks here, and just a key artifact. No one will pay to save tokens like Clues or Treasures.

Now let's finish with these two-drops! The colorless one has a 0/4 blocking body. Permanents in graveyards cannot enter the battlefield or others get cast. The White one has a 3/1 size and then no one can draw more than one card per turn, which will hurt your foe's more than us! Nice Hate Bear section!

Synergies and Winning Conditions

Approach of the Second Sun gains you seven life, and then when you cast it again, it'll win you the game! Moonshaker Cavalry will give your team flying for the turn and then size equal to your critter count! Also here is Craterhoof Behemoth.

Now let's turn to Green dork tutors! The legendary three-drop 2/3 can tap with three to toss a counter and then tutor for that mana value of counters. Nice growing your team's size over time! Then the Shaman taps and discards a dork and then tutors for one back. These are here to grab the perfect Hate Bear or win-con for the situation. Love them loads!

Archon of Valor's Reach costs six, has a 5/6 body with a ton of keywords, and when it ETBs, you can shut down the casting of all cards of that type! Since I have just one artifact and enchantment, those are great options. Elesh Norn, Grand Cenobite costs one more and has a 4/7 vigilance body with the ability to grow your Hate Bears into beaters with a +2/+2 boost in size and then opposing dorks will die or drop in size by the same amount! Love this thing to push your team well.

Let's finish this category with a Selesnya dork duo. Kutzil, Malamet Exemplar gives a 3/3 on-curve size, and your foes cannot cast things in your turn! No interaction there! Then when dorks with power greater than their base smash face, you draw too. Not common, but it's here. Dragonlord Dromoka has a 5/7 flying, lifelinking size, nice! It cannot be countered, and your foes, again, cannot cast stuff on your turn like counters. Love this shut down pair loads!

Answers

Now let's turn to removal and answers, starting with answers to answers, like this duo and Teferi's Protection to phase out your stuff. The Green instant gives your team both indestructible for mass removal and hexproof for targeted. The dork costs three for a 3/3 vigilance body and when your foes cast stuff, if no mana was cast, it's countered, so he's a hater bear, and then you can sac him for no mana to give your dorks indestructible for the turn!

The Beast costs three, destroys an artifact on arrival, and then will make your foe's artifacts ETB tapped. The White rare costs three too, has a 2/2 flying flash body to exile a spell on arrival and it's plotted and can only be played at sorcery speed, shutting down a lot of removals and interaction. Then you add in the taxing too.

Every deck needs some mass removal, even one as dedicated to permanent dorks as this one! Austere Command costs six, destroys two things, cheap dorks, costly dorks, artifacts or enchantments, Ideally you'll do pricey dorks and artifact/enchantment or both of the latter. Winds of Abandon is a two-mana Path to Exile you can overload also for six mana to exile -all opposing stuff, exiling's great way to perma-answer stuff. And they'll get tons of lands too, so they might not be that upset.

Card Draw

Now let's turn to card draw! The legendary Green dork costs four for a smaller 1/1 that cannot be countered, has a base indestructible, and must attack every turn, and the when your dorks deal damage draw that sweet card, see also Ohran Frostfang. The non-legendary costs four for a bigger 2/3 that draws when you cast that dork, quite a lot here!

Let's finish my deep dive here! The sorcery costs five, and draws equal to your dork count, quite a lot of potential stuff, and then I am running a few dorks with power 4 for the Entish Restoration and land so that count be another few life too. The Hate Bear has flash, and when a foe searches their library? Gain a life and draw that card too! Love that trigger pair here loads!

We are finished with my deep dive into all things Hate Boar! Let's turn to the decklist!