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Plane, Trains, and Automobiles

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Prized Amalgam
Hello again faithful readers! This week marks the beginning of a transitory period in competitive Magic, as we are waiting both for the full spoilers of Kaladesh and digesting the results from the final major weekend of high-level play from the outgoing Standard format. Additionally, there are always new tweaks and developments happening in our favorite Eternal formats, Modern and Legacy! Let’s get right into it by discussing this past weekend’s Open in Richmond, where I racked up a solid Top 9 finish (yep, you read that right, Top 9!) with my favorite deck in Standard, Dredge (or Zombie Emerge, or Sultai Emerge, depending on your preferred nomenclature). Meanwhile, perennial Top 9 competitor Brian Braun-Duin was busy winning the World Championships, leaving that coveted 9th place finish open for yours truly. Congratulations Brian, and thanks for letting me occupy your favorite place in the final standings of my tournament while you were cleaning up in Seattle!

All jokes aside, my thought process going in was that I was already very very solid against all manner of Bant Company decks, and I wouldn’t want to tweak very much at all. After all, why mess with success? I ended up adding a Stitchwing Skaab to the sideboard to hedge against opposing Infinite Obliterations naming Haunted Dead. Then, I figured that it was time to join the hater train by putting a single Infinite Obliteration in my own sideboard! I wanted to add some percentage to my Temurge and mirror match equity, and that seemed like a reasonable choice. Emrakul, the Promised End is no joke, and it becomes a lot easier to win when your opponent doesn’t have any left in the deck. I probably could have stood to shave a single land from my deck for a main deck Nissa, Vastwood Seer (to help against midrange-y decks while still being an Emerge-able body and finding me a land to discard to Haunted Dead) or a second main deck Vessel of Nascency. This would have opened a sideboard slot back up, and I could have slotted a second Distended Mindbender back in there. The biggest problem that I found was that my opponents were Obliterating my Elder Deep-Fiends instead of my Haunted Deads, so by shaving the Mindbender in the board for a Skaab, I actually hurt myself against those opponents. It’s funny, because at the Invitational I was getting my Haunted Deads all exiled! I suppose by getting one more sideboard slot I can cover that a little bit better. Lesson learned.

Regardless, here is the list I ended up on for the Open, where I ended up with a record of 11-3-1 (No byes, draw unintentional), bringing my overall record with the deck in matches played to 21-5-2.


80% win rate is no joke, and my record against Bant decks of various stripes speaks to the power level of this deck. 3-0 at the Invitational, 2-0 at the RPTQ, and 7-0 at the Open against Bant Company, Bant Humans and Bant Spirits means I am pumping my fist every time an opponent opens up with a Canopy Vista. I believe that one of my draws and at least one of my losses could have been avoided with better play, but the deck is so darn complicated that it’s hard to play it well over the course of a long event. A perfect player would have a nearly 90% win percentage with this deck, which is absolutely disgusting and makes me wish I had another few months to master this unique archetype. As it currently stands, unless we get some superb enablers in the next set, we may have to shelve this deck alongside some of the other “great decks that no one figured out in time” of Magic’s history.

Incidentally, I was fortunate enough to get the opportunity to do a deck tech on this beauty, so if you want to see me clown around on camera and talk about some of the busted stuff this deck is capable of, check it out on YouTube!

I’m very excited to record some videos with this deck as I practice for the MTGO Standard PPTQs and PTQ on September 17th, so if you’re hungry for some calamari, fear not! You’ll be able to watch some Eldrazi Octopi burst out of Zombies very soon.

Now, even as I expound on the virtues of a moribund Standard’s secret best deck, we are getting inundated with some very interesting spoilers for Kaladesh, which seems to be shaping up to be a cross between Mirrodin and Ravnica with a few Anakin Skywalker-esque podracers thrown in for good measure. Buckle your seatbelts, get ready to buy your Pokemon energy cards, and prepare yourself for an onslaught of “high-octane gasoline” references from writers discussing the powerful Vehicles and the implications these half-manlands, half-equipments bring to a fresh Standard.

For your infotainment (that’s informational entertainment, for those of you who aren’t hip to late-’90s neologisms!), I’ll go through my initial thought process when Vehicles were first spoiled to the world at Worlds last week.

“Wow, sick, podracers. Kind of dumb, but you know, they gotta keep coming up with new ideas somewhere. Vehicles aren’t that far-fetched.”

“So if I activate one Vehicle, then I can use that one to activate another one? Hmm . . . ”

“Wait. If I get an artist to alter my Vehicle cards, can I appear on Pimp My Ride?”

*Spends ten minutes thinking about how to get Magic cards on TV with Xzibit*

“Okay, so the actual competitive implications. How are these different from an equipment? They stick around through sweepers, they let new creatures power up to an above-the-curve size, but they give new creatures pseudo-haste, and they can trade in combat and let the creature stick around. They’re sort of like inverse equipment, where the random creatures you cast become equipments for the Vehicles. Like, with regular equipment, you lose the creature and the equipment sticks around to be picked up. With these, you lose the Vehicle in combat and your creature sticks around to battle on foot. This probably lets them print more powerful cards without ruining Limited (or in the case of Stoneforge-Batterskull, Skullclamp or Umezawa's Jitte, ruining Constructed). Interesting . . . ”

*At that point, I started thinking about a car holding a Jitte. Would it look something like this?*

Very clever product placement, Wizards. Maybe I’ll see if I can’t get a sponsorship from the manufacturer? I can see it now . . . 

“You have Umezawa's Jitte in your Death and Taxes deck, but you know what’s even more inevitable than death or taxes or White creature decks in Legacy? Car Theft. Your car needs a Jitte, too!”

Okay, serious time. To be fair, deckbuilding constraints for Vehicles will likely be similar to deckbuilding constraints for Equipment. The big parallels they share are the fact that opponents will frequently make a gameplan around stranding a Vehicle in play without a creature to drive it. This generates virtual card advantage, as a driverless car is useless (at least until we finally get commercially available driverless cars and I can sleep on the way to tournaments or play MTGO while I drive, but I digress).

The best Vehicles are going to be the ones that either do something even if you can’t turn them on immediately or ever, like Skysovereign, Flagship or Fleetwheel Cruiser. Both of these do something right when they enter the battlefield, and Cruiser especially is going to be a great way for aggressive decks to top out their curve and keep their random little creatures useful into the later turns of the game. Critically, though a card like Fleetwheel Cruiser is awesome on-curve as a newer, better Ball Lightning or Skizzik, if it trades off in combat, that’s the end of your upgrade for your random little creatures. Powerful equipment stuck around because creature removal is generally more plentiful and common than artifact removal, and it upgraded your creatures even as they traded off. An Ovalchase Dragster might get in a good hit, but once it dies in combat, that’s it for your creatures getting boosted.

Honestly, Vehicles seem like a “fixed” Living Weapon mechanic, where it’s very hard to break them because all they ever do is become above-the-curve creatures. I give Vehicles an A for humor opportunity, a B+ for creativity (Mark Rosewater was probably watching Cars with his kids and came up with the idea) and a B- for competitive promise (of course, we’ll see how far above the curve the design team pushed it, which may make this grade look silly in a month!) Until we see the complete spoiler, I’ll just keep thinking about outfitting my car with a bumper sticker with the rules text for “Crew 1” printed on it, or a highway HOV lane with a sign that reads “Crew 2+ required 7-10AM, 4-7PM”. I challenge all of you to come up with more, because Magic needs all the juvenile humor it can get!

Now, as for obviously powerful cards in the new set, cards we can really sink our collective teeth into, I think we need to turn to the Modern implications of one wee Legendary Land. The award for “Card that should have been printed with Metalcraft, because it’s going to be absolutely busted in Modern alongside the other Mox Opal deck” goes to a card that must have been named ironically. Lantern Control was only kept down in Modern by Burn and Zoo decks of various stripes, so a land that incidentally turns those matchups around while being a tutor for the deck’s various lock pieces is unequivocally not “Fair”.

You heard it here first, folks. Inventor’s Fair is the card that is going to get Ensnaring Bridge banned in Modern. Sam Black has been winning with Lantern for some time now, despite the relative unpopularity of the archetype. It doesn’t have many bad matchups, and a savvy player will have an astronomical win percentage once they get to maindeck a Sun Droplet attached to a tutor that is also incidentally part of your mana base . . . Wizards are you kidding me?

Sam Black’s list from the last Grand Prix could very easily slot two Inventor’s Fairs into the utility land spots, possibly even adding one in over a spell. I’m no Lantern man, but I intend to start testing the deck and getting my physical game actions up to the speed needed to play the deck in live tournaments.

Here’s where I’d start:


And I’d see if I wanted a third Inventor’s Fair from there. It’s possible a third Fair would be better than the second Sea Gate Wreckage. Obviously they are Legendary, so four seems excessive to me, but you can sacrifice an extraneous one if you have enough mana, so it’s not particularly problematic. I might even cut a Ghoulcaller's Bell for a third, but I need to get in reps with the deck before I start doing more damage with my clumsy swaps.

Before I sign off for the week, I’ll throw a bone to my Legacy aficionados with a small update on the best deck(s) in the format. While I was busy in the Standard Open this past weekend, Jarvis Yu decided to try out my 4-Color Delver deck in the Legacy Classic instead of his trusty Lands deck. It paid off for him with an easy Top 8 (though he lost in the quarterfinals to a poor draw against Eldrazi.) The only changes I would consider making at this point are cutting a single Surgical Extraction from the sideboard in order to fit in a second cheap removal spell that can handle Gurmag Angler. Murderous Cut and a second Dismember are the leading candidates, but I am open to suggestions. I also could be convinced of a single Marsh Casualties if I were interested in hedging against an opposing True-Name Nemesis or various Elves / Death and Taxes matchups (although it’s tough on the mana, for sure!)

Here’s the updated list, which I play in online Legacy leagues whenever I have the patience to wait ten minutes for a new opponent to show up. (Seriously, I love Legacy and I wish more people would play it!) It’s certainly on my short list for next decks to use in a video, so if you’re thirsty for some Legacy videos, it’s on the way!


There’s a lot to be excited about in the Magic world right now. I’ve been driving to different tournaments the last three weekends, and I’m ready to hop in a different sort of vehicle to play some Team Sealed with Ari Lax and Christian Calcano at Grand Prix: Louisville this weekend. The plan is to all wear different excellent cowboy hats, so we should be very recognizable. If you see me there, please stop me and say hello!

Ben


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