Rarely have I seen as much buzz about a single card as I saw this past month when a little green plant popped up on all of our social media feeds. Some who played Final Fantasy were thrilled to see this character included in the upcoming Universes Beyond Final Fantasy set. There were a lot of strong reactions, and variations of "it dies to Doom Blade" were thrown around a lot.

My reaction was pretty negative, and today I'd like to share a few thoughts and a decklist inspired by this travesty of a Magic card. Is that negative enough for you? Let's dive into this prickly subject.

Jumbo Cactuar is a boss from Final Fantasy VIII. In Magic it's a 7 mana green plant with 1 power, 7 toughness, and a heck of an attack trigger. When it attacks it gets +9999/+0 until end of turn. That means it's basically like Phage the Untouchable, but without any of the downsides. That attack trigger isn't limited by anything like the exhaust ability from Aetherdrift, so you can do multiple times without any real extra effort.

While thinking about this card, it struck me that maybe this is the game designers' answer to an age old and still pertinent question.

How do we get Commander players to run more removal?

I have a suspicion that this new card is their way of trying to answer that question.

10 Thoughts on Jumbo Cactuar

1) Jumbo Cactuar is too expensive for cEDH

A 7 mana creature isn't very playable in games that tend to last less than five turns, even if those turns are action-packed. This card will pop up in casual games, where it will create un-fun experiences for everyone not playing the Jumbo Cactuar. It belongs in Bracket 4, but it will show up in every bracket, and it will probably drive players to play more tutors just to go get it.

2) It's Trivial to Give Trample in Green

Not much more to say than that. It's just way too easy to give trample in Green and if you can swing with your little Plant, someone dies. Someone sits out, and if your Cactuar gets removed and the game goes on for another hour, that makes for an unpleasant playing experience for that player.

3) Gaining 10,000 Life in Casual Games is not Casual

I'd cast Swords to Plowshares on my own Jumbo Cactuar in a heartbeat, and I'd run Riftsweeper so I could get it back. 10,000 life means you really only die to commander damage, infect, combo, drawing from an empty library, or other players using cards that explicitly win them the game. In many casual games folks may just concede rather than dealing with "playing it out". That's not fun.

4) Making 7 Mana is Easy in Green

If we're not going to be seeing Jumbo Cactuar in cEDH, that means it will be showing up in longer games where it's really easy to get up to 7 mana - especially in green. I just don't see why it wasn't 9 mana to go with the +9999. Maybe there's something in Final Fantasy's lore that drove them to pick 7, but I really can't understand how they thought that made much sense.

5) Why Not Make 10000 Mana?

There are a lot of creatures that tap to produce mana equal to their own power, but there are also a few that tap to produce mana equal to the greatest power among creatures you control. Making 10000 mana has now never been easier, though if you want to make that mana in your second main phase, you'll need Jumbo Cactuar to survive combat.

6) UB Haters Have Another Reason to Hate UB

Universes Beyond is at its best when it creates cool, flavorful cards that aren't so powerful that they show up in every game and in nearly every deck. It is at its worst when players who deeply resent having to play against Lord of the Rings, Walking Dead, and other non-Magic IPs feel like they can't escape these shameless cash grabs. Jumbo Cactuar is a shameless cash grab that could become as much of a staple in EDH as Craterhoof Behemoth. The latter just needs a big army. The former just needs...

7) Overwhelming Stampede is Back, Baby

Any effect that gives +X power where X is the greatest power among creatures you control is an auto-include if you're running Jumbo Cactuar. Pathbreaker Ibex is going to love this card, as you control your own attack triggers and you get to stack them however you like. Is Jumbo Cactuar the new King of 2 card combos in mono-green? We'll soon find out, but if you add a few colors, things get even sillier.

8) Add Blue, Draw your Deck

If you put Jumbo Cactuar in a deck that's in blue, you just run Laboratory Maniac and Jace, Wielder of Mysteries. Then if you use one of a half dozen ways to draw cards based upon the greatest power among creatures you control, and it's game over, baby.

9) Brackets, Shamckets

Wizards of the Coast might think they are setting up EDH to insulate lower powered groups from toxic game experiences. Those kitchen table groups will see this card pop up, and they'll see decks go out of their way to tutor for it, and they are going to have some unpleasant games that end in a really unsatisfying manner. It won't feel fun or fair because it's neither.

10) The Cherry On Top

Jumbo Cactuar is going to be the cherry on top of a lot of game ending plays. It will get hit with Chandra's Ignition. It will get sacrificed to Jarad, Golgari Lich Lord. Decks that used to jump through a lot of genuinely enjoyable hoops and play patterns just to set up a winning play now just have to play this stupid Plant and attack with it. It's almost like they're mocking the hard work we used to do in order to mount the same kind of lethal threat.

Run More Removal

We should run more removal, but I'm firmly of the opinion that there is nothing wrong with groups choosing to play at a lower power level. Lower powered, more casual EDH games tend to lean towards players being allowed to do more with their decks. That extra room given, both in the number of turns in the game and a lower amount of interaction, allows those weaker decks to still do fun stuff. They'd be crushed or easily out-raced if they were up against higher powered decks, but that's why we try to run balanced pods with decks of roughly the same caliber.

All that said, it's still true - we should run more removal if we want to survive longer in EDH games, and we should be judicious about how and when we use it. Holding back interaction until it's really needed is, and always has been a mark of a good or great EDH player. You don't remove anything that isn't a threat to you, and if you use your interaction to save someone else, you should make sure to exact some price for your trouble.

To my mind, playing this wee Plant is every bit as nasty as playing infect, though I don't think infect is really all that bad. I'd love for tables to learn that you need to kill the player on Jumbo Cactuar first, as you know they're running ways to give it trample, haste, and all kinds of other tricks to win games with this new King of EDH Power Creep. Generally tables will gang up on the infect player and infect still has to work to get up to 10 poison counters. Tables should do the same if someone is playing Jumbo Cactuar.

Making Lemonade

Have you gotten the impression that I'm not a fan of this new card?

The funny thing is that I like winning games, but I don't like when it's made way too easy.

I don't usually want to take the shortcut and I know I'm going to resent when I get killed by this new card. I run removal. I play a lot of EDH, and I play fairly well, but it's probably going to kill me and it will be aggravating. I just hope I'm not sitting out for an hour and a half because the Cactus player got stopped after killing me.

While I don't love shortcuts, I do like brewing up new decks. To celebrate our new entry into a world where Wizards of the Coast is willing to print cards for casual EDH that just win the game with the most trivial of extra steps, I figured I would brew up a deck for it. I was very tempted to run Momir Vig, Simic Visionary as the commander. Momir Vig tutors for creatures and is in Simic, so it would be easy to aim for a Lab Man wincon.

In the end I decided it was more interesting to play every synergistic card I could think of, along with a way to give Jumbo Cactuar trample and haste right out of the command zone. I decided to go with Kenrith, the Returned King. Not only can he give my Cactus both trample and haste, he can also let me reanimate Jumbo Cactuar to try again if I get stopped.

Cactus Ken | Commander | Stephen Johnson

Cactus Ken | Commander | Stephen Johnson

• Commander (1)
• 1 Kenrith, the Returned King

• Creatures (21)
• 1 Alena, Kessig Trapper
• 1 Allosaurus Shepherd
• 1 Bighorner Rancher
• 1 Birds of Paradise
• 1 Brash Taunter
• 1 Brion Stoutarm
• 1 Esper Sentinel
• 1 Faerie Mastermind
• 1 Grand Abolisher
• 1 Grothama, All-Devouring
• 1 Imperial Recruiter
• 1 Jarad, Golgari Lich Lord
• 1 Jumbo Cactuar
• 1 Laboratory Maniac
• 1 Ledger Shredder
• 1 Pathbreaker Ibex
• 1 Prime Speaker Zegana
• 1 Riftsweeper
• 1 Selvala, Heart of the Wilds
• 1 Sylvan Caryatid
• 1 Walking Ballista

• Instants (15)
• 1 Arcane Denial
• 1 Beast Within
• 1 Counterspell
• 1 Cyclonic Rift
• 1 Eladamri's Call
• 1 Fierce Guardianship
• 1 Inscription of Abundance
• 1 Path to Exile
• 1 Pongify
• 1 Rapid Hybridization
• 1 Return of the Wildspeaker
• 1 Return to Nature
• 1 Swan Song
• 1 Vampiric Tutor
• 1 Worldly Tutor

• Sorceries (14)
• 1 Chandra's Ignition
• 1 Demonic Tutor
• 1 Essence Harvest
• 1 Farseek
• 1 Fungal Sprouting
• 1 Monstrous Onslaught
• 1 Nature's Lore
• 1 Overwhelming Stampede
• 1 Rampant Growth
• 1 Rishkar's Expertise
• 1 Season of Gathering
• 1 Shamanic Revelation
• 1 Three Visits
• 1 Traverse the Outlands

• Enchantments (5)
• 1 Defense of the Heart
• 1 Greater Good
• 1 Reconnaissance
• 1 Rhystic Study
• 1 Sneak Attack

• Artifacts (6)
• 1 Altar of Dementia
• 1 Arcane Signet
• 1 Chromatic Orrery
• 1 Conqueror's Flail
• 1 Monster Manual
• 1 Sol Ring

• Planeswalkers (2)
• 1 Garruk, Primal Hunter
• 1 Jace, Wielder of Mysteries

• Lands (36)
• 7 Forest
• 3 Island
• 3 Mountain
• 3 Plains
• 3 Swamp
• 1 Bountiful Promenade
• 1 Breeding Pool
• 1 City of Brass
• 1 Command Tower
• 1 Deathcap Glade
• 1 Dreamroot Cascade
• 1 Exotic Orchard
• 1 Forbidden Orchard
• 1 Mana Confluence
• 1 Overgrown Farmland
• 1 Overgrown Tomb
• 1 Rejuvenating Springs
• 1 Rockfall Vale
• 1 Spire Garden
• 1 Stomping Ground
• 1 Temple Garden
• 1 Undergrowth Stadium

Buy This Deck Export text

While this deck is filthy with tutors and game changers, it could be tuned up further. I didn't load in fast mana or dual lands, and a tuned up deck would go after a few key wincons rather than the wide range of cards I included that work with Jumbo Cactuar. The tutor power from Momir Vig is hard to ignore, but that commander costs 5 mana and I don't expect Momir Vig Cactus Combo would be fast enough to break into cEDH. It would be a challenge for high powered tables for sure.

To tune a Jumbo Cactuar deck down, I think you'd start by dropping out the tutors. Of course, if you do that, you won't see it as often and then you have to ask if it's really a Jumbo Cactuar deck. I could see a deck built around plants or built with a desert theme wanting this card for the flavor. I still don't love the card, but there are plenty of scenarios in EDH where players swing creatures that absolutely, positively, have to be blocked or removed.

Overreact Much?

If I'm comically outraged by this new UB card, why aren't I equally annoyed by other ridiculous two-card EDH game-enders?

As an example, running Heartless Hidetsugu and any damage doubler allows you to kill the table right quick if everyone is at an even life total. Heartless taps to do damage to each player equal to half that player's life total, rounded down. Give him lifelink and it you'll gain a ton of life. A ton of life isn't going to be 1,000 life, and it certainly isn't going to be 10,000 life. If I want to take Jubmo Cactuar out behind the woodshed, why don't I care about all of the other two-card combos that can pop up in EDH games?

I think the answer lies in my own deck collection.

I have a Multani, Maro-Sorcerer deck that I have had for many years. Multani has a power and toughness equal to the number of cards in all players' hands. The deck works hard to draw everyone lots of cards and has to run trample enablers that don't target, as Multani has shroud. I love the deck because I feel like it jumps through a lot of hoops to work. Once players are eliminated, it gets even harder to make Multani a lethal threat.

The introduction of Jumbo Cactuar into our format feels like it trivializes the work that decks like my Multani deck have to do in order to win games. Why bother playing a card like Cultivator Colossus as your "big/big" attacker when you can now tutor up Jumbo Cactuar, give it trample, and end someone's night?

The reality is that I know full well I may be overreacting.

I may not be the King of bad takes, but I'm sure I have moments where I might deserve a lesser noble title within that righteous kingdom. I also do have real and legitimate concerns about Jumbo Cactuar and how it will affect gameplay in casual EDH. Don't tell me tutors and 2-card combos only belong in high powered and competitive EDH because of the new bracket system. However well-intentioned brackets are, they won't keep players from tutoring up Jumbo Cactuar in lower powered games and doing filthy things with it.

Final Thoughts

I was going to try to play this list in my online group, but eventually decided against it. I had built a deck that I didn't think would be a lot of fun to play against on the premise that I don't think Jumbo Cactuar will be very fun to play against.

I even shared the concept and the decklist with the guys and the reaction was pretty clear. Instead I played a lower powered deck I'm working on for next week's column. The problem with a card like Jumbo Cactuar is that if your tablemates are ready for it, they have the answer(s) they need and you die. Maybe they load in Deflecting Swat. Maybe they run Act of Treason effects or play a turbo fog deck. If they're ready, you may well have an unfun experience. If they aren't ready, they'll quite possibly have an unsatisfying game.

In my experience, most of the salt that flows in EDH in low and mid-powered games comes when someone pulls a win "out of nowhere." Chip damage and telegraphed threats are what you expect in lower powered games. Hitting Jumbo Cactuar and Chandra's Ignition is the equivalent of a two card combo, and using Fling on him is the equivalent of Door to Nothingness. These are all things that casual players really don't enjoy getting hit with, but which are often too unwieldy to play in cEDH.

I don't pretend today's list is a low powered deck, and in the new Bracket system it's clearly at least a 3, if not a 4. I can see myself building it and playing it for the experience of trying to do something stupid with this stupid card. I can then see myself taking the deck apart once it's done its thing once or twice.

I still think EDH is an amazing format, but cards like Jumbo Cactuar make it worse for everyone. At least, that's my take on it. They could have built an interesting card for a notable character from Final Fantasy, but they dropped the ball on this one. I hope I'm wrong, and "JC" finds a place at an appropriate power level in EDH and doesn't make for salty, unpleasant game experiences at casual tables in the years to come. I also hope this isn't a sign of things to come, with more poor choices and bad decisions coming into our card pool but mostly just being a problem for Commander.

That's all I've got for today. Whether you agree or disagree, thanks for reading and hopefully I'll see you next week!