Launch Party by Lucas Graciano

After wrapping up 2012 and starting 2013 with several weeks of issue-heavy coverage across Magic’s top sites, I figure it’s time to sit back in our metaphysical Vorthos Lay-Z-Boy armchair, put on the Sinead O’Connor, and indulge in some gratuitous art ogling. So, let’s enjoy some of the best head in Magic.

Vedalken Heretic by Greg Staples

In real life, baldness might be due to the afflictions of illness or old age, neither of which is generally desirable. But taking these afflictions to an artistic realm: Illness translates to an ethereal, martyr-like strength and conviction that has a beauty all its own. Old age becomes wisdom, intellectual prowess, notable life experience points—all of which are attractive.

Natalie Portman in V for Vendetta, Wodu Media

Captain Picard, IFC dot com

Baldness can also be the result of some kind of practical impetus, such as a job requirement. Most likely, that job is badass. I have a friend who first shaved his head when he worked as a commercial fisherman, and many serious athletes rock the smooth look. Thus, hairlessness might also connote a no-nonsense or take-no-prisoners personality.

Demi Moore in 1997’s GI Jane, Film Society Lincoln Center

Michael Jordan and some other dude, CBS News

The most interesting side of the bald look, however, might be the deviant one, this tag deriving simply from the rarity (more so amongst females) and the ability to weather the exposure level (both males and females). Without hair, erotic areas such as our ears, neck, and collarbone are fully exposed and visible. For many, there’s a certain amount of inherent sexual attractiveness in anything “foreign” or “exotic” as well, and baldness reads as alien, which is not normal, which is deviant from the norm. Lovely.

Sinead O’Connor, The Offical Sinead O’Connor Website

Our pantheon of Magic’s most wonderfully bald covers the spectrum of prototypes and features a dazzling array of colors, types, allegiances, occupations, and power levels. Feast your eyes on the lovely bare domes below and vote on your favorite badass badly at the end of the article.

Crosstown Courier by Chase Stone

Angel of Despair by Todd Lockwood

Echo Mage by Matt Stewart

Fallen Angel by Matthew D. Wilson

Momir Vig, Simic Visionary by Zoltan Boros and Gabor Szikszai

Teferi, Mage of Zhalfir by Volkan Baga

Myr Superion by Jana Schirmer and Johannes Voss

Goblin Gaveleer by Svetlin Velinov

Azorius Guildmage by Christopher Moeller

Nin, the Pain Artist by Brad Rigney

Karn, Silver Golem by Mark Zug

Goblin Fireslinger by Pete Venters

Suture Priest by Igor Kieryluk

[poll id=218]

We are fortunate to have incredible diversity in our Magic art and our Magic community. Let’s keep leveling up. Hope you enjoyed this romp through the artscape of the gorgeous Lex Luthors and Mrs. Cleans of MTG. Thanks for reading. And I’m sure I’ve left off some great images—so if you have a moment, let me know in the comments section. Until next time, may Magic be your sexy bald guy in a wheelchair. With cat.

-MJ

@moxymtg

Professor X, Just Marvel X-Men